Engaged? Congratulations!

Marriage is a wonderful gift, designed by God. By it a man and a woman are joined for life – it’s a big commitment! We’d love to help you as you prepare not only for a wedding but also for a loving, life-giving marriage which lasts.

Please contact the Clergy via the Church Office to make an initial enquiry. You may find these answers to FAQs helpful.

Who can get married at St John’s?

There are certain legal requirements which must be met in order to get married in a Church of England church. You qualify if at least one partner:

• lives in St John’s parish. You can find out what parish you live in at the “A church near you” website.
• was baptised or prepared for confirmation in the parish
• has lived in the parish for six months or more at any time
• has at any time regularly attended public worship in the parish for six months or more. With enough time, you can establish this connection before the wedding
• has a parent or parents who lived in the parish for six months or more in your lifetime
• has a parent or parents who regularly attended public worship here for six months or more in your lifetime
• has a parent or grandparent who was married in the parish

You will need to meet with a member of clergy to prove one of these connections. We will then read ‘Banns of Marriage’ (announcing your names at public worship three times, to legally confirm your eligibility to marry) before the wedding. We encourage you to come to church on those Sundays to hear this done!

What if we don’t live in the parish or near enough to worship regularly, but have a link that isn’t a “qualifying connection”?

It may be possible for you to be married by an Archbishop’s Special Licence. You will need to demonstrate a ‘genuine and long-standing connection with the church’. If the Vicar agrees to your being married this way, you will need to apply for the licence from The Faculty Office.

Does residence or nationality matter?

If either partner is not a national of the UK or Ireland and doesn’t hold Settled or Pre-Settled Status under the EU Settlement Scheme, you are required to apply for a Superintendent Marriage Registrar’s Schedule. For details of how to apply, please see this page.

When can we have the wedding?

Please talk to us before you book a reception venue as we cannot guarantee availability of our clergy or buildings. With a few months’ notice we can usually hold a Saturday or Bank Holiday wedding, and of course it is possible to marry on other days of the week.

How will the church help us to prepare for married life?

All couples who live locally will meet with a member of the clergy several times in the months before the wedding. This will help us to get to know you and to taylor your wedding service to reflect you as a couple. We’ll help you to talk through some of the challenges of married life – money, children and wider family, and navigating conflict and disagreements. You will also be invited to attend a Christianity Explored course (or similar) to understand the Christian context of your wedding.

How much does it cost?

The Church of England sets fees of around £530 (in 2024) to cover legal fees and staff time, as a not-for-profit charity. There are no extra charges but we leave it to you arrange flowers and musicians. We have contact with several organists and can help you to arrange a booking with them.

What if we don’t go to church?

You can still get married if you have a legal qualifying connection. Please visit any Sunday to see what you think!

What about remarriage after divorce?

The Church of England leaves each parish minister to establish a policy in accordance with their own conscience and understanding of the Bible’s teaching, so you will find parishes differ widely.

At St John’s we understand that marriage breakdown is complex, and that under certain circumstances it is right to remarry whilst your previous partner is still living. Please contact the clergy for a confidential and sensitive conversation about your situation.

You may also wish to have a service of prayer and dedication after civil marriage, which may be appropriate even if a church wedding is not.

What about same-sex marriage?

The Church of England is not legally authorised to conduct same-sex weddings, and we do not offer prayers of blessing for same-sex couples in this parish. We understand that many people will find this hard and upsetting, and we will gladly meet with you to explain why we believe that Jesus’ teaching makes this necessary. You are warmly welcome at any of our church services or events.

To understand a little more about our beliefs in this area, take a look at the Living Out website. Everyone at Living Out has a story to tell of God’s wonderful love and the impact that has on our lives. Listen to same sex attracted Christians tell their stories of enjoying their new identities in Christ.